Modern Medical Technology: Friend or Foe?

Due to the whirlwind roller coaster ride that I allowed my doctors to take me on, I have maintained radio silence. I have since found the emergency stop button, and have let myself off.

It's been a ridiculous week and a half. I left my 16-week doctor appointment with a two thumbs up from the doctor, and instructions to come back in a month. Later that same week, I get a call saying that my blood tests that were done to measure my MAFP levels were off. This test is a screening test for Down's, Edward's and Neural Tube Defects. Mine came back with a higher than normal result for a possibility of a neural tube defect.  I allowed myself to panic about this as she continued talking about babies with no brains. She then told me I would need to come in for an amniocentesis right away.

I'm not crazy about needles, especially ones that are inserted in my stomach and cost nearly $1000 out-of-pocket. I had been warned about the Korean Medical system and their somewhat questionable fund raising tactics. So, I did my research. I looked up all the possible things a neural tube defect could be. I looked up ultrasound images of those with and without neural tube defects and compared them to my own images.  If I could clearly see that my baby had a head and a brain inside her head, why couldn't the doctor? These Korean doctors just love us self-diagnosing Westerners. Koreans don't question. They simply do what they are told. Not me. I emailed her back with 'my findings' and told her that everything I read suggested that an amniocentesis was really the last thing you should try. A Level 2 ultrasound, for instance, is usually the next step to look for problems of this nature. I got the run around, and I was told that it would take more than a month to get a Level 2 ultrasound scheduled. This is why the doctor felt amniocentesis would be better since it could be done sooner and is 99% accurate. Did I mention that the Level 2 Ultrasound costs about $150 and the amnio $1000?

Initially, my impatient self and my need for immediate answers led me to agree to this procedure. As always, however, God seems to step in.  When we went in for the procedure, she discovered that my amniotic fluid levels were too low, and an amniocentesis would not be possible. Miraculously, in light of this new information, she was able to schedule me for a Level 2 Ultrasound for that same day. So, I was able to avoid the needle and the 1:1000 risk for a miscarriage. The radiologist wasn't able to find any indication of a neural tube defect, but he did confirm my amniotic fluid levels were 50% of what they should be. He also found echogenic bowel, which could mean most likely nothing, an indication of Down's, a fetal infection, blah, blah, blah.

So great, more stuff to worry about. I left the clinic feeling no less worried than when I went in. It didn't help that shortly after I got a call from OB simply stating that she would be referring me to another OB for my care.    After all of that, she still felt that I should have an amniocentesis, but she didn't feel comfortable performing it herself. So, I made a new appointment for an amniocentesis with the new doctor. He, of course, couldn't get me in until 2 days before I am to fly home for my sister's wedding, which meant I couldn't go home. Non-refundable ticket...so my amnio would now be costing me more than $2000.

And then, there it was...my epiphany. I'm not an idiot. I can read. I had the radiology report. I read it. I took a step back, and thought over all the information that had been thrown at me in the last 48 hours, and soon realized that when you put it all together it was simply ludicrous and madness. The devil is so crafty...so, so crafty!

What does the devil do? He comes to steal, kill, and destroy.  I reminded myself that the test that started this madness was simply a screening tool and not a diagnostic one. The false-positive rate is ridiculously high, and no one should really give it that much thought. Originally, they told me my risk of Down's was super low. My problem area was a possible neural tube defect not Down's. They never would have requested an amniocentesis test based on my risk assessment for Down's. So now, after the radiologist clearly told me several times that he can't see any problems, does my doctor still think an amniocentesis is necessary? Because of the minute, very minute risk of Down's based on a picture that could be absolutely and most likely is nothing at all? The light went on finally. Even if that were the case, no test is going to change or correct Down's. So, why would I pay for a test that won't change anything, won't allow the doctors to fix anything, miss my sister's wedding, miss work, and risk losing a perfectly healthy baby all for the sake of a test in which the outcome will be the outcome whether I know it in advance or not? The devil really is a sneaky fellow.
In one act of fear, I could have destroyed a perfectly healthy baby and wasted more than $2000 doing it. And to what end?

Not only that, but all this worry and running around with our heads cut off has made me lose weight, and I have lost a much needed week of study for my upcoming GRE test. With all of the above thoughts, there was no way I could make myself concentrate on GRE test prep.

So, let this be a lesson to all of those who are here in Korea and at home alike who might someday be put in this very position...A quote from my wise mother, " Don't let the doctors talk you into borrowing trouble."

I am not angry with my doctors, and will still be going to my original OB. I spoke to her today, and explained to her my logic, which she agrees makes sense. It is her job to think of worst case scenario. It's my job to listen and sort through what lines up with God's word and His plan for my life and what doesn't. I'm so thankful for my mom and dad-in-law who know just this, and continuously remind me when I forget.